So I decided to take some new classes this year, knowledge is always power and I have a huge text book fetish. I found a seminar that sounded interesting - "Head Games" at The Pleasure Chest, LA's premier sex store. Two pierced and tattooed beauties - Courtney and Shelby - with identical high arched, glam eyebrows were our educators. Courtney was raven-haired with a sleeve of bright colored tattoos on her right arm. She wore a slinky wife beater with no bra and it was hard not to stare at her breasts and almost visible nipples. I'm not gay or bi, but I can always appreciate a good set. Shelby was a striking red head with piercings. She majored in religious studies and philosophy, but her human sexuality minor ended up being her passion and her bread and butter.
A dozen women gathered in an area roped off by a red velvet curtain in the bondage clothing and brief section. I looked around at my fellow classmates - we went from late 20's to 30's and mid 40's, possibly early 50's. No one stood out as an obvious student for a blow job class. A couple of women made jokes, but no one was visibly uncomfortable. Our teachers introduced themselves and started the class by responsibly going over STD's. Then they went into condoms and lube (their recommends at the bottom). I felt a bit awkward getting out my notebook, but there was no way I was going to remember all this. As I started diligently taking notes, I noticed that at least 4 other women were jotting things down themselves. We all got a cucumber and had to put a condom on it with our mouths. Then we were instructed on manual techniques. Courtney warned that you should remove all rings when doing this, you could pinch your fingers. So even the wedding rings had to go. The woman next to me quipped, "Especially if you're not with your husband." We got to try Jo Premium - an incredibly soft silicone lube - as we were told "the wetter the better" and shown two-handed swivel techniques. Then we moved on to oral and were shown suction tricks. That said, enthusiasm was emphasized as more important than any skill. Eye rolling or yawning was ruled highly verboten. We also went over gag reflexes and how to deal with them. Courtney joked that you can always take a time out by doing "the porno cheek" which is basically sticking your man's shaft in your mouth sideways. It makes him look huge and is a great ego booster while you rest. Both women were no nonsense and informative weaving personal stories of their sex play into the lesson. We finished up with the stepchildren (testicles) chapter (varies from mano to mano), prostate pointers for the brave and sex toys. One woman in the class was highly knowledgeable, commenting that Kama Sutra lubes are all sugar and can cause infection as well as the fact that cock rings with clitoral vibrators take expensive watch batteries that run out quickly.
Class ended with Courtney and Shelby confirming the rumor that Altoids under the tongue can be used for your man's menthol pleasure and you can even try some pop rocks for fun. Since we got a 10% discount, most of us left class and picked up our own Jo Premium silicone lube and $1.25 rubber cock rings. Needless to say, our respective beaus were going to be some very lucky dudes ;)
Courtney and Shelby's (www.thetwoladies.com) recommends. In addition to being sex instructors, both of them worked at Pleasure Chest for years. Basically, they know their stuff.
Latex condom faves - Pleasure Plus (squeezes less at head) and Inspiral (shell shaped, a must for pierced fellows). Polyurethane faves (for those allergic to latex) - Avanti, Trojan Supra.
Lubes - Oil base of any kind is a no/no - disintegrates condoms, can cause infection. Use Water based lubes - they like Sliquid H2o. Has no wax or glycerine and is recommended for vegans :) Silicone based Premium Jo is also highly lauded (only premium Jo is silicone). Super soft. Some people are sensitive to this though.
And, yes, I did wear my new boots (above) to class. It seemed wrong to be the usual slumpy student for this seminar ;)
No comments:
Post a Comment